rictalk

Phobias

2009-02-24T10:55:00.000-08:00

Am I alone in this or do you cringe when you hear "eating sounds"?

When I hear co-workers or anyone else slop their way through soup or crunch through an apple or carrot, my stomach does a back flip.

It's worse when I hear it in the media. There's a commercial on TV featuring a dog slobbering and crunching it's way through the ad... I have to turn the channel.

Oh I'm okay when I'm the one doing the slobbering and crunching... that could be part of my weight situation... after I got into Herbal One and dropped 35 or 40 pounds, at least I'm working my way through fruit and veggies (particularly crunchy and mouth watering).

Anyway, it's my phobia... next to snakes, pierced tongues, self inflicted tattoos and heights.

I'm sure I have others... but I'm hungry and I have an apple and a bowl of Oatmeal Crisp staring me in the face.

Lost

2009-02-02T07:05:00.000-08:00

I'm lost.

Well, actually I'm a Lost fanatic.

Alright, I admit it...I can't go through a week without my dose of TV's wacked out science fiction (or is it?) series. It's my hour-long getaway from anything rational.

I stumbled across the series' pilot when it was first shown... I wasn't planning on it. In fact, I was looking for something else when there it was in all its wierd glory.

Jack, Kate, Sawyer and all the rest caught up, after a plane crash, on the island that has a life of its own.

If you've been a "Lost follower" (not the 70's Peterborough bar band, although with a few beers they were good escapism too) then you'll know that the whole mixed up mess involves time travel.

I'm still anxious to find out the story behind the smoke monster.... if you don't watch, it's kind of like a 3-pack a day mother of five trying to quit... only not as bitchy.

Anyway the show involves great scenery, good acting and fine writing (although I'm not sure what THEY'VE been smoking, some episodes). And it reminds me that in a sea of reality shows, there's still something entertaining to watch.

And how many of us haven't wondered what it'd be like to find ourselves stranded on an island in the south Pacific like modern day Robinson Crusoes, only with enough others (in this case, "Others") to start our own little fiefdom.

The only thing I'd miss is my weekly dose of "Lost".

Halloween Herb

2008-10-29T08:30:00.000-07:00

The stock market's on a roller coaster ride and so are my extra couple of pounds.. this week they're gone, next week they're back... I blame my addiction to chocolate.

Y'see I've had this sweet tooth, especially for chocolate, since my first Baby Ruth which I ate too long ago to remember the full mouth-watering experience.

Already I'm salivating.

Halloween is a tough time for me. We don't get many trick or treaters at our house but we always over buy, just in case. The houses in my neighbourhood are spread out too much and the driveways are too long.

When you're kid tring to fill the loot bag, time is of the essence. Driveways need to be no more than 20 metres and the distance between each front door should be no more than 30 seconds... 45 at most.

But we buy too many chocolate bars and Hershey Kisses in case some kid who doesn't know about the loot collection rules strays onto the property.

When that happens, I don't feel sorry for the little princess or pirate.. they get one thing and one thing only. I'm saving them from an obese future.

So what am I gonna do with the left-overs?? Oops, gotta go...it's time for my weekly butt-kick, er, weigh-in.

Herbivore

2008-10-17T08:59:00.000-07:00

Honest to goodness I thought I'd end up putting on at least ten pounds over Thanksgiving.

I guess the Herbal One plan has been drilled into me pretty good because I actually pushed myself away from the table (not kicking and screaming...I did it on my own).

Nothing I like better than a festive meal... turkey, all the trimmings, pumpkin pie and whatever else I can find.

But it came down to smaller portions, which is what I've learned to do over these past few months. I went in for my weekly weigh-in after Thanksgiving and I was down a couple of pounds from the previous week.

Somehow I felt I let my Thanksgiving traditions down. But maybe I'm starting a new tradition... my arteries sure like this one, anyway.

So it's steady as she goes. Now I'm gearing up for Christmas. Oh God did I just say Christmas?

Herbal-go-Round

2008-09-25T07:36:00.000-07:00

I've found another way to lose weight.. I'm pretty sure the nice people at Herbal One won't recommend it.

Y'see my wife and I took our grandchildren (girl 6, boy 2) to the Lindsay Ex. Of course the midway is a big item on the "must-do" list. Keep in mind that I don't even go up a ladder very well, let alone go around in circles at break-neck speed.

So there we were, my grandaughter and I, buckled into the "Tilt-a-barf". Not wanting to show my fear I put on my brave face and so we went round and round, up and down, back and forth... oh golly it was so much fun (tongue firmly planted in cheek).

You've gotta understand... I'm a sucker for Fair Food. Ice cream cones, something that resembles a hot dog, other indescribible stuff that packs on at least a thousand calories each and wallows in some sort of fat.

A trip on the "Whirl 'n hurl" will cut that enjoyment short. I couldn't eat a thing.

Thus I was able to stick to Herbal One with no temptations whatsoever.

The girls in the office are proud...as they snicker behind my back.

Herbalopalooza

2008-09-15T09:35:00.000-07:00

So I'm having trouble sticking to my goal weight of 171 pounds... up 3, down 3, up 2, down 2... it ain't the fault of the Herbal One folks who offer me encouragement.

I'm thinking they're gonna sit me in the corner with a dunce cap soon, altough I'm sure they're too nice. Maybe they shouldn't be that nice.

Weekends are my biggest problem... every time I'm invited out for dinner and the hostess says "...here finish this off"... I'm like a little lap dog goin' "yup, yup give it to me, give it to me"

Okay... I'm refusing that second helping... I've refilled the tires of my stationary bike... I've reaquainted myself with the Bowflex... now I'm walking toward the exercise area of my home... walking... walking... walking... staring... climbing on board... this'll do it... Herb'll be proud.

Herbalympics

2008-09-02T08:33:00.000-07:00

40 pounds(almost) and 54-inches.

Sounds like a sporting event but it's just little ol' me getting smaller. See, I'm also getting on and preparing for old age when we all shrink somewhat.

Actually it's a good thing...feeling better, lookin' better (if I do say so myself).

I'm having trouble getting rid of that last pound or so... maybe I'm pregnant. I've been retaining water or something. Certainly my body doesn't want to let that final little bit go...

I'll keep working on it and I'll let you know.

Meantime if you want to lose a few (it's good preparation for Thanksgiving and Christmas eating) call Herbal One in Peterborough or Cobourg. They'll look after you.

Ciao (chow) for now
Ric Johnson

Batman XV:The Dark Herb

2008-07-28T05:09:00.000-07:00

Have you seen the latest Batman movie? Me neither.

I figure it's only number one at the box office because people want to see Heath Ledger (The Joker)in his last role before he was found dead in his apartment.

Man, you talk about a lifestyle change!

Speaking of which, I'm losing track of how long I've been involved with the Herbal One plan.

I started in February when I told Jan I'd like to lose 40-pounds and said "make it so".

Who says the last 10 pounds are the hardest...it's the last two!! I've been wallowing within two pounds of my goal for the last couple of weeks. My buddy at Engery 99-7, J.C. Coutts says he's been planing out too... mind you he's down about a HUNDRED pounds since he started last fall.

But he's just showing off.

Anyway, it's weigh-in day and I'm still two pounds away. I was a good boy this past weekend... healthy food, proper portions... Jan says it takes a couple of days for your body to realize you're serious.

I like to think my body just wants me to know who's in charge.

Maybe I'll go see the Batman movie... stay away from buttered popcorn... and Twizzlers... if I have an Aero Bar I'll just eat the bubbles...

Herbie the Lifestyle Bug

2008-07-18T11:03:00.000-07:00

Getting closer and closer to the goal of 40-pounds. After a weekend of debauchery (I gained two) I'm back on the good side of 36 lost.

I think it was Mae West who said "..when I'm good I'm very good but when I'm bad, I'm better". So I'll do my best to be bad in a good way the next couple of weeks. I'll hit my goal and then it's on to a year of maintenace.

The girls at Herbal One try to drill it into you that it's not a diet, it's a lifestyle... I'm slowly coming around. And I'm not so round anymore.

I'm dead last in the 20-pound challenge with Heather at Herbal One and J-C at Energy 99-7. They've dropped about 12 pounds each and I'm sittin' at 8... gotta tell ya, I probably won't make 20 but I'll get close.

Next week is measurement time...my favourite time of the month. Go see the folks at Herbal One if you need to lose a little or a lot... it works!

herb-a-long

2008-06-26T04:27:00.000-07:00

Three weeks since I last blogged? Funny word, blog. A body part, maybe? Sounds like I need shots before my blog falls off. But I digress.

Speaking of falling off... the weight's been doing just that thanks to the great people at Herbal One. This close to 35 pounds since I started in February... hopefully by Monday. WAIT! That's after the weekend and weekend's haven't been kind.

Okay.. by next Wednesday then...

People are funny. Friends I haven't seen for awhile come up to me and say "Hey, you're losing weight...lookin' good!" Then say they... "Are you sick? Y'okay? You're losing weight on purpose I hope..."

Never felt better... I keep going back to those arm cuff thingys at Loblaws to check my blood pressure. I do it to prove that I can lower my blood pressure by looking after myself with proper eating habits which are being drummed into me by Heather and Jan and Sarah at Herbal One on Lansdowne Street West in the No-Frills Plaza.

And what is it about that blood pressure contraption in the grocery store. I'm sitting there with my arm stuck in the thing and everyone I know comes through the front door of Loblaws at the same time. What, did you all come in the same bus to check out my readings? I might as well be wearing a target. Yeah, it's me...yeah, I'm losing weight and no I'm not sick...

Talk to later
RJ

Herbal Y'all

2008-05-30T08:10:00.000-07:00

Corndogs and grits and hushpuppies...oh my.

Last weekend I was in Charlotte, North carolina for a NASCAR race. Right in the middle of corndog country...down in a part of the world where they deepfry everything, transfat be damned!

Don't get me wrong, in a previous life (or maybe lifestyle) I couldn't and wouldn't pass up a corndog. Just thinkin' about them makes my arteries quiver.

Anyway, I passed them up...not easily...but I went straight for the healthiest stuff I could find. If there's anything I've learned while doing this Herbal One plan it's restraint... by the end of it, it'll be routine...

The other thing I've learned is that there are a number of things I enjoy that are okay...just don't eat 'em right out of the serving bowl.

Anyway, by the end of my 5-day junket into the land where cholesterol is considered a food group, I came away with about the same weight I went in with...

I cheated a little, but I didn't have any corndogs or grits or hushpuppies, oh my. I guess that's my idea of restraint for now.

Herbal shmerbal

2008-05-13T06:17:00.000-07:00

It's a slow descent but it's working.

I started off losing all kinds of weight and inches but now I've settled into a half-pound here, a half-pound there...but, for the most part it's going the right way.

My cohort at Engery 99-3, J.C. Coutts is really on a roll...in fact he's down a couple of rolls and a pail of mashed potatoes...about 55 pounds worth.

They've got a great deal if you want to lose a few inches before swimsuit season. Talk to the folks at Herbal One in Peterborough on Lansdowne West in the No Frills plaza or in Cobourg on Elgin Street, next to the Party Place.

As for me, my thong is already calling.

It's All About Herb

2008-05-06T09:28:00.000-07:00

Okay, so it's been awhile. My computer's been on the fritz and since technology and me don't mix very well I had to wait until somebody came along who knew something.

So here I am halfway through my HERBAL ONE program and I'm more than half way to my goal of dropping 40 pounds. On Monday I weighed in at 185 and lost about 36 inches... not in one place, just all around... which I was before I started. Round.

Don't know what to get mom for Mother's Day? How 'bout a Herbal One gift certificate.

Your biggest dilemma may be how to tell mom she needs to lose weight... "Hey mom, happy Mother's Day. Now put down that fork and back away from the cake!!"

I'll leave that up to you.

But your mom will come around eventually and she'll thank you for it.

Herbal One gift certificates in Peterborough on Lansdowne Street West and in Cobourg on Elgin Street next to Party Place.

Herbs and Splices

2008-04-18T09:28:00.000-07:00

It's like a pilot breaking the sound barrier...

Okay maybe that's a little dramatic, but I've broken the 190lb barrier. All the way to 186!

It's about time I went over to the blood pressure thingy at the drug store and see how I'm doing...the last time, around Christmas, rather than give me a read out it just said "check yourself into the hospital, you fat out of shape pig"... or words to that effect.

Anyway, now I'm Mr. Healthy, the weather's great and my shorts are waiting... I'm feeling Herbalicious.

By the way, if you're in the Cobourg area, there's a great deal at the Elgin Street Herbal One. The first ten people who come in and sign up for the full program get a starter kit free (worth about a hundred bucks). They're right beside The Party Place, kitty-korner to the Northumberland Mall.

Halfway Herb

2008-04-14T09:21:00.000-07:00

I'm doing my happy dance!

Today I'm half way to my goal of dropping 40-pounds. This surprises me, because I usually go for the comfort foods when I'm stressed.

Last week I had to rent a more powerful sump pump after the two I have just couldn't keep up. Needless to say, some minor water problems in the basement before I could get it hooked up. Evereything's fine now but the stress of dealing with that and having laryngitis for the second time in about two months ( I see my career ending before mandatory retirement...I'm very paranoid about these things) and I'd usually be headed for the Haagen Daz.

Anyway, the thought of a scolding from the Herbal One ladies sent me straight on a route to the apple dish. A nice Courtland can be very comforting, doncha know. And don't get me wrong about the Herbal One girls... they're very supportive, they don't scold... but I know what they're thinking. Did I mention my paranoia?

Anyway, it's the start of week-8 and I'm Herbaling along.

Herbal One Day Later

2008-04-01T07:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday marked the beginning my fifth week on the Herbal One plan. So the good news, I've dropped a total a 30-inches....no, I'm not shorter... I'm talkin' circumference (waist, neck, butt, chest, legs, arms etc.).

I'm also down 16 pounds or about 4 a week, which is a little better than average... mind you when I started I was also somewhat larger than average, so I guess it all averages out.

My buddy at Energy, JC Coutts is doing phenominally well... 40-odd pounds since November... he's a shadow of his former self.

Herbal One.. try it.. it works!! Peterborough and Cobourg.

Herb-a-licious

2008-03-31T06:05:00.000-07:00

It's measurement day!

Every couple of weeks the folks at Herbal One check your progress by measuring various and sundry parts of the body. I should be down to a C-cup. My belt can be tightened another notch, so I'm assuming the rest of me is slimming as well.

Saturday's Earth Hour was helpful...it was so dark I couldn't find the fridge for my usual evening snack. I'm into my fifth week of the Herbal One program but I still find weekends the hardest .... we've had some birthdays and other family things that involve cake and other wonderful foods that put me into my formerly rotund shape.

Anyway, here's hoping I measure up ... I'll let you know.

Bump In The Road

2008-03-25T10:10:00.000-07:00

My drive to and from home quite often takes me through Warsaw.

The frost leaving the ground has heaved a small mountain on County Road 4, the English Line, not far from the Fire Hall. It's Warsaw's answer to Canada's Wonderland.

I'm sure everyone from the area has hit it at about 50-km/h. And if you haven't you're in for a thrill. A bone jarring, shock distintegrating, tie-rod bending, sinus clearing thrill.

I hope its removal, or leveling, is included in the upcoming budget. If not, maybe the township could put a fence around it and sell it. Use the revenue to fill in some potholes on McCracken's Landing road.

Yes I'm whining.... it's what I do when I have a cold.

Herbal Update

2008-03-25T09:59:00.000-07:00

Alright, so I was a bad boy over the Easter weekend... I thought I was eating healthy but it appears I was wrong!

I gained about a pound from my last weigh-in last Thursday... so now I'm on the straight and narrow again....I promise.

Actually I'm down about 13 pounds since I started four weeks ago so I'm somewhat on track. Right now I also have a cold... you know, feed a cold starve a fever. Needless to say my cold is full.

Anyway I'm on the road to recovery. My fat pants are still loose and the others are still a little tight but getting better. Hey, I'm almost ready for the next notch down in my belt!

Shy and retired

2008-03-17T05:13:00.000-07:00

Are you as tired as I am?

I'm as tired of people telling me they're tired of this extended winter, as I am tired of it.

I'm tired of political posturing. It happens everywhere at all levels and I just want politicians to get on with the job at hand... we voted you in, now cut down on the partisan crap and get to it!

I'm tired of so-called Reality TV... The Bachelor, My Dad's Better Than Your Dad, Survivor, The Nanny, Wife Swap.... they just make me tired.

I'm tired of my second bout of laryngitis in this overly long winter.

And now, my car needs tires.

I think I'll just sit down and rest.

Herbal One-derful

2008-03-17T05:04:00.000-07:00

Going into week 4 of the Herbal One program... my fat pants are loose the stuff in my closet is close to fitting. Of course I'll have to dust them off, so I figure I've got a couple of weeks to go before they'll feel comfortable anyway.

Herbal One has a 50% off deal till the end of the month so call them up at the Peterborough office, 748-9999..

SMOKIN' CARS

2008-03-06T11:42:00.000-08:00

As if the police don't have enough to do, now the Ontario government wants to pass a law preventing people from smoking in their vehicles when they've got kids in there with them.

Yes it makes sense and most smokers know what they're doing to themselves and their kids but to have the police on the lookout for car-smokers is ludicrous.

What are they going to do, include that offense in the RIDE stops? "Have you been drinking? Smoking? How old's the kid in the back seat? Are those his DuMauriers in his pocket?"

Is the province so strapped for cash that we need the police to hand out fines for car-smoking? And you just know there's a clan of holier-than-thou's anxiously awaiting this law so they can call the police at a moment's notice and turn in their neighbours.

There will always be the defiant few who will smoke around their kids in enclosed places... just as there are those who refuse to wear seatbelts. Some defy the law simply as a matter of what they consider their personal rights.

Look, I'm not a smoker and I appreciate the non-smoking bylaws that allow me to enjoy a restaurant meal or go to a hockey game without sucking in second hand smoke..... but this comes down to a matter of education.

Continue to remind them what they're doing to themselves and their kids and, eventually, it'll sink in. Might take a couple more generations but it'll sink in.

Herbaling Along

2008-03-06T07:32:00.000-08:00

So I've been on the Herbal One program for 12 days... I'm not "thong-ready" yet but give me a few more weeks.

My goal is to get down to where my pants (the ones in my closet that I haven't worn for a while... a long while) will be comfortable again.

That means losing about 35 pounds and a bunch of inches.

I've been going for my daily weigh-ins and a periodic scolding, both of which are helping me stay on course.

How 'bout JC Coutts from next door at Energy 99.3 ... he's halfway to his goal of dropping 70 pounds.... he'll be a mere shell of the cuddly northern moose he was when he first started walking our halls...